switch-off-the-stars:

squidsqueen:

dw:

when did we replace the word “said” with “was like”

When it occured to us that “said” implies a direct quote, while “was like” clarifies that you mean to communicate the person’s tone and general point without quoting them word for word.

THANK YOU

(Source: pitiful)

  • Guy on train: I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos.
  • Me: *turns up music*
  • Guy: I said I'd fuck you if you didn't have so many tattoos!
  • Me: *takes off headphones* Leave. Me. Alone.
  • Guy: Why the fuck do you have so many tattoos?
  • Me:
  • Guy: Are you fucking deaf as well as a piece of trash?
  • Lady by door: Hey. Leave her alone.
  • Guy: Are you her trash girlfriend? Fucking dykes, all tattooed like fucking men. Disgusting waste of pussy.
  • Lady: *moves forward, carefully moves jacket so only I can see the badge on her belt* Are you okay?
  • Me: Fine. Just wish he'd go away.
  • Lady cop: I can make that happen.
  • Guy: Oh, yeah, bitch? Who the fuck are you? I'll kill you!
  • Lady cop: And that's what I was waiting for. *grabs guy, holds him against the door* Harassing women on the train was enough, but you just threatened a cop. You're battin' a thousand tonight.
  • Entire train: *applauds*
  • People love talking, and I have never been a huge talker. I carry on an inner monologue, but the words often don’t reach my lips.
    ― Gone Girl (Gillian Flynn)

    (Source: wordsthat-speak)

    what if you woke up tomorrow and discovered you had turned into your tumblr icon

    (Source: theyellowbrickroad)

    So you like chemistry puns…

    aceinnatailsuit:

    captainriz:

    imageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimageimage

    HOW HAVE I NEVER SEEN THIS BEFORE

    IT’S LIKE THE WHO’S ON FIRST OF SCIENCE JOKES

    ivanswaginsky:

    hello everyone that needs to do their hw

    do your homework!! you can do it!! after you’ve finished you can blog all you want!! DO YOUR HOMEWORK FRIEND YOU CAN DO IT